1/3 Life Crisis

It's not a midlife crisis because I'm hoping to make it to 100 years old. This is my one-third life crisis. I'll be turning 33 years of age this week. I can't really wrap my head around the idea. I still identify myself with a bunch of 20-somethings. My parents will probably read this and laugh because I'm pretty sure they still feel 20 in their minds. To me it seems that as we grow older, we all want to stay young, energetic and fun, but still collect a lifetime of experiences to become more wise. It's a catch 22. Only time allows us to learn, grow, experience and become more. But that darn thing called time is also what prohibits us once our bodies are ready for their final rest.

About three months ago I needed a change. I didn't know what kind of change, but I was beginning to go crazy in my own skin. I didn't make any rash decisions, and I didn't pick up and move across the country (like I always feel like doing.) No tattoos. No Ferrari. No Pony. No sugar daddy. Instead, I dropped my full-time status at work. This means I'm going to lose my insurance benefits in 6 months. It also means that I should have more free time to do what I want, only, I don't. I went out and I got a second job! Why? I can pinpoint a few reasons. 1) I like to be social and meet lots of people. 2) Having a job gives me a purpose whether it be big or small. 3) I know Jake would disagree with this statement but I feel like I need to be sure I am pulling my own weight in our relationship. We don't have children yet (yes, YET. Sometime.) so I don't think it would be right of me to just take a break and stress our budget-- especially when we're looking for and trying to buy a house. A house...that's another story for another day. I'm perfectly capable of working full-time right now so I took a second job... as a server! I served tables for a couple weeks back in college. It wasn't my favorite thing, but it's pretty decent money without much commitment to an employer. So I currently have two jobs where I work with a bunch of young people. There are plenty that are my age and younger, but not many that are older than me. In recognizing this the other day, I started to reflect on my life, status, career, etc. Which consequently, put me into crisis mode.

I work at Whole Foods Market where I cut fancy imported cheeses and I work at OHSO Brewery where I serve people american food and craft beer. When I talk to people who are older than me, I get embarassed when I tell them what I do for my "profession." When I talk to people younger than me, they seem excited and interested in what I do and they think it's "cool." So what is this inner struggle that I'm having? Is it me "growing up?" Is it ridiculous that I've used quotation marks three times in the last three sentences? I like both of my jobs and I absolutely love all of the people I work with, but I am left unfulfilled. Do I want a white collar job? No. Call me crazy, but I think I would really enjoy a job that requires digging in the dirt. I could be outdoors all day. (when it's 115 degrees in Phoenix I could spend all day outdoors in a different city.) Maybe I just need to start gardening daily. Something I've learned about myself is that I am a nature lover. I am most happy when I'm spending time outdoors. Outside of my house. Outside of an office. Outside of the media.

Maybe it's time for a career change, or maybe it's just time for a new hobby. Whatever it is, I need to dedicate more time to the outdoors and to myself. This upcoming 33rd birthday has gotten me more riled up than any other number birthday. I'm not sure why that is, but I know that I'm ready for another change. Yes, I am that part of the population that likes and embraces change. It's my gypsy soul and I'm glad that my Jakey puts up with it because he is stuck with me forever and that's the one thing that I hope will never change.

I've wanted to build an earthship for a really long time now. If you know me and you don't know what an earthship is, then we must not be very close friends. This has been my desire for a good chunk of time and I think this may be the year to move on it. I've also been looking into shipping container homes and I'm realizing that it is difficult to find someone with real expertise who would be interested in minor individual projects like this, and difficult to find a single place on the internet with all of the general information one would need to start a project like this. I only got this idea yesterday, but maybe I need to be that person/website people can go to for information about creating homes like this. I'm passionate about anything and everything eco-friendly so maybe that's where I need to focus my energy this year.

Career + Interest + Outdoors + Environment = Cody's Fulfillment???

Do I feel like I'm running out of time? Yes. Is 66 years enough time for me to finish everything I have yet to start? Was this entire post just a pep talk to myself? Probably. I think my blog has turned into more of a personal journal than a show and tell page. My words are free flowing. I am editing myself less. My thought process is starting to manifest itself and you are witnessing how scatter brained I can actually be. My dad taught me the word tangent at a young age. He tangents. I tangent. The word has a bad connotation but when I allow them, tangents usually move me forward and I learn things about myself along the way. We have to entertain crazy ideas in order come up with the genius ones.

I don't make New Year's Day resolutions. I always make Birthday Year resolutions. I won't share with the blog world what ALL of my resolutions are this year, well, at least not today in this post. *Raised glass. Here's to a killer year and no limits to our dreams! 

Puerto Rico

I went to finish a post that I started typing last week and I also found this post hiding in my Drafts folder from January.... eek. You can tell from the last sentence that it's obviously incomplete but I don't know if I'll ever add to/finish it so I may as well share some of it!

It was summertime in Phoenix... so it was hot and I was cranky. Jake has the opportunity to go out of town with his job occasionally but I'm usually in Phoenix working my 40-hour amazing retail job. Yes, that was sarcastic. Retail is never amazing. Anyway, I was itching to get out of town and we had the perfect excuse-- our 7 year wedding anniversary. I began looking at some travel options. I wanted something really exotic-- like a Mediterranean cruise. However, I could only get one week off from work so something closer to home made more sense. Plus Jake has not updated his passport since it expired. So what's the most exotic place we could go without passports and within our budget? Puerto Rico! I'm actually glad that we couldn't travel any farther because I'm not sure we would have otherwise ever visited PR.

We had a blast! I took pictures but they were with my new smart phone (which I still have and still hate) and I'm just unfamiliar with uploading pictures from my camera onto my computer. Yes, I am an old fart and I refuse to give into this new technology. Somehow I have figured out Instagram and you can check out a couple of Puerto Rico pics under my name @codythegirly. Haha, before I posted that sentence I had actually typed it as a hashtag. #codythegirly. Then I googled #codythegirly and Instagram came up with the @ symbol at the beginning of my name. See, I really don't get this new age stuff.

ANYWAY, we had fun. We couchsurfed 3 nights, slept on the beach with new friends one night, and got a hotel one night. Our first couchsurfing friends were a very artistic couple who are trying to start a hostel in San Juan. They had two other surfers staying the same night and we went out to a bar and played pool for a while. The city of San Juan stays up late. The people are all about living life which was a welcoming start to a vacation. Even though most of them have jobs during the day, they find it equally important to go out at night and dance and have drinks with friends. We met a guy at a gas station who invited us to a local spot that was a few blocks away. Jake and I squished into his front seat and went to meet a bunch of his friends. We asked everyone what we should see while we were visiting and they marked up some spots on the tiny and simple map that we had received on our flight. It was a pretty fun first night in a country that is half-familiar. More about that later.

Our second day we headed west along the north coast to Arecibo.